This Is Me: Cruz's Story

What do you love? What makes you feel safe? Who are your people? Most of us could answer these questions without a second thought. For Cruz, they are questions he is only now learning to ask.

For the first year of his life, Cruz was living on the streets. He and his siblings were subjected to violence from biological family members. When he was one year old, he was placed into an orphanage. While the orphanage provided a safer environment than the streets, it did not provide the personalized care Cruz needed to heal and thrive.

For the next two years, the orphanage was all Cruz knew. These were some of the most important years of his development, and he spent them without a family to comfort him, guide him, or know him.

In many parts of the world, Cruz might have remained in the orphanage for years, with an uncertain future. In fact, an orphanage in Mexico that recently shared its data with us reported that the average length of stay for a child is six years. Many children remain there until they age out at 18.

But thankfully, there was a better way for Cruz. When he was three years old, he was welcomed into the arms and hearts of a loving foster family.

Learning to Feel Safe

When Cruz first arrived with his foster family, he was noticeably delayed in several developmental areas.

Although he was over three years old, he was not yet potty trained. His family noticed that not only did he have difficulty communicating his needs, but he also had trouble identifying them in the first place.

In desperate need of individual attention, Cruz had an indiscriminate attachment style. He would go to anyone without hesitation, even initiating physical contact like hugs. On the surface, this made Cruz appear sociable. But it's an important developmental milestone for children to form healthy attachments to close family members, recognizing them as their safe space and keeping a distance from strangers.

Cruz tried hard to follow directions given by his foster family. But at times, he showed outbursts of impulsive behaviors, lacking control of his emotions and displaying an inability to regulate his actions.

With love and compassion, Cruz's foster family gave him the attention and care he needed. And soon, Cruz began to understand what it means to be part of a family.

Gaining Ground

In just three short months, Cruz made tremendous progress. He was completely potty trained and demonstrated a greater awareness of his body's needs.

Cruz gained significant ground in regulating his behavior. Like any three year old, he still cried and got angry when limits were set, but he was able to recover more quickly. He also started preschool and did well interacting with his peers while showing great interest in learning through play.

He formed a strong bond with each member of his foster family. While he remained sociable with others, he stopped willingly going to other adults. Instead, he began looking to his foster mother before interacting with others. His foster family described him as affectionate and cheerful, mentioning that he enjoys playing with all members of the family.

After a few more months, Cruz had made clear improvements in his language. He showed a greater ability to communicate ideas, needs, and experiences. Our staff psychologist and his family continued to work with him to identify emotions, and Cruz began to express his own feelings, paving the way for more important milestones.

Discovering Who He Is

Based on the progress observed in language and emotional identification, our staff psychologist will begin helping Cruz learn and recognize who he is.

Because Cruz's few years of life were filled with trauma and uncertainty, he has a limited sense of self. But with this individual attention and care from both his foster family and our staff psychologist, Cruz can begin to understand who he is, what he likes, who and what is important to him, what makes him feel safe, and how he can communicate when something is wrong.

Through age-appropriate, playful techniques and "This Is Me" activities, Cruz will start to build his sense of identity and belonging. We can't wait to see this beautiful little boy grow into who he is meant to be, surrounded by the love, encouragement, and stability of a family.

Thank you for making it possible. Your support and partnership are building a better way for so many children just like Cruz across the globe. We are so grateful.

Together, we are changing the way the world cares for orphans. Because every child deserves a family.